A poem

it doesn't have a name, hence the lame title of the blog...lol


Reaching,
Reaching.
Deep down inside of me
Further than I ever have before.
Down through my head.
Past my brain thinking destructive, but sometimes good, thoughts.
Past my throat stuffed with food and cold water.
Past my heart, beating strong and working hard to keep this large body alive
Past my lungs breathing hard as I go up the stairs.
Past my stomach, growling in frustration and quivering with anxiety.
Off to the right I see a very faint glow and I know that’s where it is.
As I turn toward the glow, I see that the way is blocked.
Globs of fat and tentacles of fear start to grab at me as I try to get closer to my destination.
Holding me, digging in, begging me to stop now and turn away.
I keep going.
The faint glow grows brighter until I can finally see the object settled snuggly in the wall of fat, barely visible.
It is bright, but doesn’t hurt my eyes.
It is not very large either, only the size of a stone.
I stand there gazing at it longingly with the tentacles of fear holding me tight in place.
So close, yet unable to reach for it, right in front of me.
Slowly, I start to raise my arm, struggling against my restraints.
Feeling my movement, the fear digs in more and holds fast to me.
But it is no match for me now.
I reach out and carefully pull the stone out of its resting place.
There was but one word etched on the stone.
Determination.
Even though it was cool to the touch, I could feel a warmth starting to spread throughout my body.
It calmed the anxiety and quieted the destructive thoughts, one by one.
It urged my arms and legs to move forward.
It opened my eyes to the path in front of me.
It destroyed the unfound fears that used to suffocate me.
And as the determination grew inside me, two more stones appeared: purpose and peace.
I knew what was before me and I was ready to face it.
I could move forward and achieve those things which in the past had eluded me.
I was ready.
I was determined.
I had purpose.
I have peace.